By Susan Lamonica
Flylady came along at a very sad time in my life. Sometimes feeding the cat (not negotiable if you have a cat) was my only accomplishment. After nineteen months of Flylady, instead of suffering and having an occasional “good day”, most of my days are peaceful and I have an occasional “dark day”.
Flylady taught me that my clutter and depression were intricately linked. I am not sure which is the chicken and which is the egg. But for me, depression and clutter are married to each other. While there is medical support for depression – therapy, medication, I found the most significant boosts in my mood once I began decluttering.
Decluttering didn’t begin happily baby-skipping to the sink – more like sobbing and crawling. I have yet to live the day when I get through every task on the daily routine list. Inevitably I skip something; usually several items. For the worst days when I was utterly lost, I have the “The Dark Day Rules”.
1. GRACE Flylady gives a “grace period” for each babystep and habit. To me, “grace” means forgiveness with no judgment or penalty. I am still giving myself a grace period on some routines. Doing a routine once a month instead of every week is a huge improvement over “never did it”.
2. BE STILL This is my “keep the status quo” rule. I will not allow myself to “sabotage” what progress I already made. This rule says, I may not move forward today, but I am not going to create new clutter.
3. SHINE THE SINK The sink is my life preserver. I always see hope in my sink.
4. FLYLADY I read the Flylady emails. Sometimes,inspiration found there evaporates the dark cloud, allowing me to begin again.
5. TIMER Sometimes I think of God sitting in Heaven and asking him – is this what I am supposed to do? Sit here desperate and sad? I envision him rolling his eyes and then I laugh and get out my timer. One minute of FLYING.
There is a difference between being gentle and giving up. I have learned from Flylady; that even sadness can be decluttered; and the God Breeze will drift in.