I have a “Needs To Be Fixed” box. Things people made, a piece chipped off. Refrigerator art, detached from magnets. Stopped clocks, needing odd sized batteries. I intended, on some rainy day, to get my super-glue, needle and thread, write down the correct battery…
When I joined Flylady, and began decluttering, I found I keep so much that is “broken”. I box it up, convinced the broken should be fixed before I move forward. I can’t buy a new clock; I need to fix this one with a battery. I can’t love; I need to fix my vulnerability to hurt. I can’t change; I need to fix my inclination to make mistakes. I’ll find the “right” battery, for the clock, the “right” words, to heal my broken heart, the “right” explanation to understand why so much in my life went wrong.
There was symbolic release, in putting the “Needs To Be Fixed” box into the trash without looking inside. I knew if I opened the box, perfection and fear would insist I fix and keep everything. Flying asks “need, use, love” – and taught me I can’t fix the past, and more importantly, do not “need” to fix the past, even if what is broken is something I once loved. I can only choose to free myself, from the past.
All I have to know is, if it does not work, it’s time to let it go. The best of my future does not depend on fixing what broke, long ago. The best of my future depends on releasing what broke, long ago.
Flying, is allowing the broken pieces to fall away. Flying, I am free to love what works, today.