This Moment of Truth

I ask do I need, use, love, inanimate objects,  projects,  career,  relationships.  I know the answer immediately, in my heart, but find myself wanting to “wait” to see if an external change will resurrect a need, use or love of the clutter.  After all, I could use this, if I got what I needed, if I felt that love again.  I keep the clutter, and wait.

It’s taken Flying, to learn that saving “maybe things will change”  clutter can be a way of wanting to transform a disappointment into something meaningful.  I don’t want to admit, that an investment of time, energy and love was lost, or never really materialized.   Flying, I see that the immediate answer in my heart is the right answer.  Waiting for change, for external situations or people to infuse value into my clutter, is saving false hope.

In releasing the clutter of what I hoped to be, hoped to do, hoped would happen, the real release is in the tear that falls, when I say, this never happened…and it is time, to let go.   It is this moment of truth, that opens the space, on the shelf, in my heart, for peace.  It is in this moment of honesty, that I find the faith to believe I want what is real, now, rather than waiting for what never quite was.

Flying, is trusting that my heart does know, what can no longer wait.  Flying is knowing that, when I let go of lost hope,  new hope can begin.   Flying, my heart finds  peace, in the  release.

Susan
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