If promised $10 Million Dollars to de-clutter my house within two months, would I de-clutter?
If offered $1,000,000 in exchange for going to bed before midnight for one month, would I start, tonight?
For $10,000,000, I would be at the grocery store right now purchasing every plastic bag on the shelves to give away or throw away clutter. For $1,000,000, I would be in bed at 11:30PM, just to make sure I did not lose track of time.
Flylady says de-cluttering for fifteen minutes, getting enough rest, every day, will give me love for myself. I find excuses to de-clutter “later” or “tomorrow”. I let distraction steal my sleep.
It surprised me that I would do for money what I will not do for me. Why don’t I consider myself of value? What is my value, to me?
Flying has shown me that when guilt, perfection and fear define my value, it is impossible to love myself. Self-criticism and failure over-shadow love. I adopt the habits and routines to bring me “just enough above chaos to stay out of crisis”, believing “just above chaos” is the highest level of my worth. This is survival FLYING. It is not FLYING with love.
Love is learned, when I act in love for myself every day. It takes time, patience, a leap of faith. Each habit, each baby step, each release of clutter, is a lesson that teaches and reinforces love. I learn, I deserve more than survival. I learn the value of my own love.
FLYING for survival, is where I have been. Flying for love, is where I want to go.