The Albatross Around Your Neck

Dear Friends,

We all don’t think we are perfectionist because there is nothing perfect around us, but hiding behind that imperfect exterior is a latent perfectionist just waiting for the most importuned time to rear its ugly head.

Think about our unrealistic goals of perfect ……… We hear those words come out of our mouth every single day. Oh! Isn’t that just perfect!  We have placed the same albatross around our children’s necks too. That needs to be perfect. I am beginning to count the word perfect as one of those nasty words that we are not supposed to say.

Perfect is pressure we put on ourselves to perform.  You know we are not circus animals or trained parrots. We are people who live our lives the best way we know how. Perfect is not a place I want to be.

What happens when you attain perfection?

Bowl a perfect game?
A hole in one on the golf course?
Hitting the bulls eye with the arrow or bullet?
A no-hitter in baseball?
The perfect wedding day?
The perfect holiday turkey?
The perfect Christmas Tree?
The perfect job?
The perfect husband or wife?
The perfect car?
The perfect day?
The perfect house?
The perfect dream vacation?

Bowling: the next time you bowl what you do have to look forward to; Nothing because you have already reached perfection.

That poor pitcher with the perfect game: So sad to think that it will never be that good again. If you think of it like that then it will not ever be. But is getting out there and playing ball is your passion then being consistent can sustain you and your team.

Wedding day perfection: I hope and pray that our wedding day is not the highlight of my life. It rained all day; the preacher got stuck in our yard. It was a good day but every single day I spend with Robert fills my heart with joy. Perfect is not an option for our relationship or our wedding. We have a good day whether it is sitting in our picture window working a crossword puzzle or walking in our woods. I guess the mundane is what gives us comfort. Just knowing that we are here; walking our little path through life together. Holiday Turkey(like in the pictures) I gave up on that a long time ago. I cook our turkey the day before and then I  just have to heat it up the next day.

Life is too short to allow perfectionism to steal your days and your joy. Celebrate everything; Don’t get dragged down into the pit of despair because it will never be that good again. It is all in how you look at things.

Let go of your perfectionism; life is about progress not perfection. Take babysteps to do what you can, with what you have where you are; then celebrate each and every step. These celebrations are to be filled with laughter.

From the day we were born we have been hammered on the head with being perfect: Hammered by our parents, teachers and those television shows and commercials that betrayed women as having it all; The perfect husband, perfect 2.2 children, perfect career, perfect hair it goes on forever. The only problem with this brainwashing was no one ever told us how to accomplish this. We were just expected to do it and it all come out perfectly. Who knew that life happens and we are really suffering with all this guilt because we are not perfect. We thought that everyone else was perfect or so we believed until you joined this cyber-family. There are almost a million imperfect FLYbabies and we celebrate even the smallest babystep.

Perfectionism is a fine line between being a SHE (Sidetracked Home Executive) and a BO (Born Organized). Imagine that there is a line drawn in the sand. The BO person goes overboard past that line and has trouble letting go and resting; while the SHE gets up to that line and says I don’t have time to do it right and then does nothing. We all have the same hours in a day; whether we work outside the home or work at home taking care of babies. We all have homes and deserve to live in homes that hug us. When we let our perfectionism drag us down; we become overwhelmed by the process. We forget that it doesn’t have to be perfect to be better than it was. Take those babysteps and just do something. You can do anything for 15 minutes and housework done incorrectly still blesses your family! Imagine that you don’t have to clean like your mother did and no one is going to stand over you till you do!!!!

I want you to FLY! Perfectionism is keeping you from loving yourself.


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