I have told you about my Granny in the past. I do not believe I ever heard her raise her voice in my whole life. My mother was one of us, a SHE who never really found out how to get her life in any order.
My memories of her are of yelling and screaming for us to clean our rooms and do our chores. My chores were the kitchen,(cooking too), bathrooms, and sewing clothes for us. My granny taught me to sew when I was eight years old. As a result of all my sidetracked nature, my room never got clean. It was piled up to the ceiling and I had to hear endless screaming, yelling, and beatings because of the clutter in my room and the clutter in my mother’s closet.
It was also my job to get her out of bed each morning and help to find her clothes and shoes. She was a teacher. She had so many shoes in her closet that it was hard to find the mates, I still cringe at the thought of my shoes being on the floor. I tell you all of this, and you may have some of the same memories, because yelling is not a good way to remember your childhood. If I had not had my Granny, I don’t know where I would be. I am blessed to have had my Granny in my life. I am also glad I had the childhood that I did. It has made me the woman I am today. I truly believe this. It helped me to help you!
Please watch the tone of your voice and your words. Words can be KIND or MEAN, the CHOICE is yours!
It seems like patience is getting shorter every year. People are quicker to whine and complain. It almost seems like a badge of honor to post on Facebook about something that is not like you would like it.I know this email has hit home with many of you. I feel that there must be even more who are afraid to tell me their feelings. You don’t have to tell me! Be honest with yourself and let go of this guilt along with your impatience and perfectionism.
Behavior Modification for yelling and being short with your babies or anyone else.
1. Keep a journal, each time you yell or say something harsh; even if it becomes a thick book.
2. Look at what is going on when you yell. Are your under time pressure? Is the guilt of a messy home making you lash out?
3. Practice using a whisper to talk to your children. It is very hard to yell in a quiet voice. For your husband; just shut your mouth and don’t say what you are thinking!
4. Put that SMILE on your face. It is really hard to be mad with your have that big grin.
5. When you catch yourself filling with rage, then take a deep breath and look at those sweet faces of your babies.
6. Don’t forget, the children need to be trained how to handle cleaning chores too.
7. Your babies are only little once. They will be grown before you know it. I know mine is forty years old.
8. Another thing to do when you are mad is leave the room. Go outside!
9. Say a little prayer and ask God for patience.10. When you feel like posting something hateful on Facebook; go watch a kitten video.
10. When you feel like posting something hateful on Facebook; go watch a kitten video.
11. When you are about to shoot off a hateful text; then click on a game app on your phone. I am in love with Trivia Crack. It helps me derail my frustration. This goes for sending hateful emails too. In the time it takes to complain about an email you have received; you could unsubscribe from their FREE Service.Remember my 3 rules to live by.
Don’t sweat the small stuff; what doesn’t matter, Doesn’t matter.
(Who is going to remember the spilled milk 15 years from now)
Laugh every day, even if it is at yourself.
(all accidents, have a funny side, if you will find them and embrace the moment with laughter)
Love like there is no tomorrow.
(This one will get your right where it hurts most. Do you want your child’s last memory of you to be one of yelling and anger.)
It is up to you to change this nasty behavior.
I feel that it has to do with the fact that you still have put time pressure on yourself.
Make your plan(routines) and work the plan as fast as you can. This way you will have the time to spend teaching and loving your babies through their little ups and downs. It is up to you to show them how to handle their anger. Were you ever taught? Now is the time to change. When you know better you will do better. No excuses.
Enjoy the gift you are given.