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Friday, May 9, 2008

Leanne's Menu mailer...

Dear FlyLady,

I would like to know if any of Leanne's menu planners would be good for my diabetic mother. I need to lose weight and since we live together, which menus should I subscribe to? I especially love my crock pot - how could I combine these.
Thanks so much,
Flybaby S.

Dear Friend,

When I was diagnosed with diabetes my doctor recommended that I use Leanne's Low Carb Saving Dinner and Low Carb Menu Mailer to help me control my sugar. The book and her Menu Mailer helped me to learn how to eat and buy food.
Here is an essay that Leanne wrote;
Dear Friends,
Someone who is near and dear to my heart is my counter personality, The Dinner Diva. I like her because she's a little brassier than I am and tells it like it is. I like to hide behind her apron. LOL!
The Dinner Diva has had a few questions lately that I have parsed down to one big question. I think (and I believe the Dinner Diva would wholeheartedly agree) this is something that is worthy of answering:
Dear Dinner Diva,
Low carb, low schwarb! Can't you see that this fad has passed? What's with the new Saving Dinner book being low carb? Who wants that anymore?
Ticked in Tallahassee
Dearest Ticked,
I hear you. Like a lot of people, I believed the same way and hoped that low carb fad diets would hit the skids anytime soon and I couldn't wait. I poo pooed the idea and scoffed at the notion of those limiting their carbs. In my mind, eating low carb was eating bacon, eggs and steaks. You call that healthy?!
I did a little research and discovered going low carb didn't need to look like steak for every meal. Quite the contrary—it could be a lifestyle of variety, flavor, actually contain vegetables and be outright healthy. In the meantime, I tried going low carb myself. Not only did I feel better, more satiated, and eating less food, but I began to read and read some more on the actual, real life, not manufactured for your viewing pleasure, science. There really is something behind this low carb phenomenon. It is here to stay and I'm very glad it is. I guess you could say that I'm a believer.
In August of 2003, I realized this was something exciting and introduced my first Low Carb Menu-Mailer. It is a popular choice on SavingDinner.com and I realize now more than a year and a half later, that low carb isn't a diet; it's a lifestyle and it is here to stay. About a month after the low carb menu debuted, I began to get an amazing amount of email and testimonials about how these menus were a powerful tool in the fight against diabetes! Well, I hadn't banked on that, but a testimonial from an endocrinologist who copied my sample menus to give his patients sealed the deal. Low carb is indeed here to stay!
A few weeks ago, our own FlyLady was diagnosed with diabetes. I thank God that her diabetes is manageable at this point through food and exercise. You better believe I put my nickel's worth into her diet! Yes, she does the low carb menu (with her doctor's blessing—our own Dr. Neal!) and has not only lost weight, but is feeling great. Even without diabetes, there are a TON of people out there who are carb sensitive. I've set up FlyLady's diet to have the bulk of her carbs (good ones! Nothing junky) in the morning and by the time dinner rolls around, she's doing the low carb menus for the Saving Dinner Low Carb book.
In the spirit of loyalty and friendship, I am doing this program with her. I don't have diabetes, but I am definitely very carb sensitive and need to really watch it. I believe I am not alone in this and there are thousands of you shaking your heads yes and saying, "Me too!" You don't have to have someone giving you a diagnosis to benefit from a change of eating that will not only help you lose the body clutter, but help your overall health! Remember that!
I set up the low carb menus so there are 10 or less net grams of carbs for the entrée—not counting the Serving Suggestions). And because there are certain members of your household that aren't going to want to do low carb all the way, I included regular, non low carb Serving Suggestions offered as well for that person or persons. You don't have to make two dinners so you can low carb it and the kids don't have to. Isn't that great?
Just as the first Saving Dinner book offered you the recipes, menus and shopping lists divvied up by weeks and seasons, so does this book. I think this is the way to go in today's world —having the hard work of menu planning already done and ready to go. The shopping lists are again at your convenience, on my website in a printer-friendly format, just go to www.savingdinner.com and click on Shopping Lists. You don't need to schlep your book to the grocery store and take a chance on losing it.
A big caveat to those who may be following certain, low carb diets with big lists of do's and don'ts. This book does not adhere to any one low carb diet plan. It's just low carb, end of story. You won't find oddball ingredients like pork rinds, weird ketosis inducing, low carb mixes made with strange things you've never heard of. I use regular ingredients and admittedly, I've been skewered for it. People have written absolutely unprintable emails denouncing my low carb ideas because I had the audacity to add 1 tablespoon of whole wheat flour to a recipe--even though I've kept the recipe very low carb. Apparently, in their eyes I've committed the Carbinal sin (get it?) by using big no-no ingredients.
But the issue in my mind is keeping the recipes low carb (they are) and using real ingredients, easily accessible and found at just about any market, to carry out this goal. I've held true to this principle for years: that the more natural and real your ingredients are, the easier it is to accomplish and keep up as a lifestyle.
Consider this book as another weapon in your arsenal to keep you organized and on target to help you get dinner on the table. With this tool, you can have accomplish this without having to sacrifice your time, health objectives or sanity. Saving Dinner: The Low Carb Way is all about helping you meet your goals.
Love,
Leanne
http://flylady.net/pages/FlyShop_SD_LC.asp
This essay was written a long time before we published Body Clutter. Leanne's Body Clutter Menu Mailer is based on the menu plans that she developed for me. Our book Body Clutter and the Body Clutter Control Journal all work together to help you learn how to feed your body with good nutrition. Check out the Body Clutter section on our website.
http://www.flylady.net/pages/body_clutter_main.asp
- FlyLady

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Paper clutter and bills...

Dear FlyLady,

How can I keep up with my bills? I am so stressed because my office is so filled with paper clutter. When do I pay my bills?
FlyBaby in a cluttered chaotic office

Dear Friend,

A couple of the major stressors in our lives are money and paperwork. Now I can't wave a magic wand and make more money come into your bank account, but I can give you to the tools to help you handle wisely what you do have.
In our basic weekly plan we have a couple of days (no not days; just a few minutes on Wednesday and Friday) set aside to pay your bills and put together a grocery list. What you have told me is that you can't understand why you don't just pay your bills when you have the money. Well I understand why! It is called procrastination and lack of an appointed time to sit down and do them. The bills are hiding in a hot spot on the dining table or floating around in the car or heaven forbid your bottomless pit of a purse. So in order to pay a bill you have to be able to find it. Imagine that; knowing where your bills are, where your checkbook is, and how much money is in the bank, and then being able to find a stamp to mail the envelope. If you had all of this in one place then that would be a stressor turned into a blesser.
Here is how you do this. When you bring the mail in the house; do not pile it on the dining room table. Open it up immediately; don't set it down thinking you will get to it later! Then get rid of the junk mail and put it in one place. Then when Wednesday or Friday rolls around, you will know where they are and that is one less frustrating step that you have to take to pay them.
This is why we developed the Office in a Bag. It doesn't matter what kind of zip up binder you use as long as you keep your necessary items in one place so you can find them. The beauty of using a zip up bag with a carrying strap is that it is portable. So when you have those 15 minutes at soccer practice, your lunch hour or waiting for an appointment; you have everything you need to pay your bills, plan next week's menus and a grocery list. Just look at all the stress you have relieved by putting together this little tool. Not to mention the money you have saved in late fees and over spending at the grocery store once you actually use your basic weekly plan. With menus, a grocery list in hand and a shopping trip; you will no longer find yourself standing in front of your refrigerator at 6:00 pm saying, "What's for dinner?????" That is another one of the big stressors in your lives.
There is no magic wand here; it all fits together but you have to start by putting a couple of pieces in place. Imagine all the stressors in your life as a big jigsaw puzzle. When you dump the puzzle out of the box; it is a jumbled mess. Then you start by tuning over all the pieces so you can see them clearly. I think this is what our FlyLady emails and website are all about: Looking at things just a little harder and trying to figure out how it all fits together. Then you start to put the framework together, by finding all the flat sides. This is your routines, basic weekly plan, taking care of yourself, decluttering and keeping that sink shining. Before you know it; the outside frame is put together and you start filling in the various sections. Each little section is one of these stressor that play havoc with your health and life. As you put in place one little section at a time (these are the areas of your life and home that have been in CHAOS) your puzzles gets easier and easier to fill in the missing pieces. The finished puzzle is a picture of peace for your life.
I know this sounds kind of simple but it really is. If you will just start with building your framework of your simple routines (Control Journal), get dressed to shoes each morning and keep your sink shiny; then you will begin to feel a sense of accomplishment and some of your stress will go away!
To see the Office in a Bag and get an idea of what to put inside of it; go look at the photograph on the website. We all have the stuff that goes inside the bag; that is why we DID NOT include it with the Office in a Bag.
http://flylady.net/pages/FlyShop_OIB.asp
We have also had a lot of people wanting to know how to purchase our tools. Look for the toolbox link to the FLY Shop under FlyLady's feet on your homepage. http://flylady.net/
Don't allow your procrastination to keep you sidetracked this year.
- FlyLady

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Beginner BabySteps...

Dear FlyLady,

I'd love to do my first '27 Fling Boogie' and start decluttering 15 minutes a day. But there is one thing I still can't get past: now that I have found Flylady and things are slowly starting to come together (for the first time in many years) I am now the closest I've ever been to starting to complete those 1/2 done craft projects or use those nail polishes etc that have been 'waiting' in boxes for years. I don't want to throw out stuff that I have been wanting to get to for so long (and might actually now be organised enough to do!). What should I do?? I fear that if I keep it all I might never progress in getting organised - but if I toss it/give it away, I'll feel like a failure as it is just another reminder that I rarely finish any of my projects. Please help!!
I love the Beginner BabySteps - but if I miss a day, should I start again at Day 1 or just take up where I left off?
Thank you for all that you do.
Trying to Fly 'Down Under' (Australia)

Dear Friend,

I am going to start with the Beginner BabySteps. NO you don't have to start at the beginning at the bottom of our email it says, "You are not behind! I don't want you to try to catch up; I just want you to jump in where we are. O.K.?
It is your perfectionism that wants you to start over. Let go of it and jump in right where you are and don't look back.
As for those undone projects. They are weighing heavy on your head. Let them go. Here is an essay I wrote about all of our unfinished projects.
Dear Friends,
Why do we have Craft Rooms? This has been bothering me for a couple of weeks. We feel that we need a place to call our own. A place to do our craft all by ourselves, yet when we have it, we are unable to use it. In the end we return to the flow of the family and spread our craft all over the place. We wanted our craft room to get the supplies that go with our craft out of our family room, kitchen and dining room; Oh I forgot our bedrooms. Since it is our room, we feel that we have the right to leave our craft right out in the open: one unfinished project after another. This stuff piles up, until we can't even get into our craft rooms, much less work on our craft. Then we are filled with the guilt for letting this stuff take over OUR room; with all this clutter in our way, our creative SHE minds go hiding. The guilt and chaos are eating us alive; we are paralyzed to clean up much less create.
So how do we reclaim our creative minds; I don't care about the room, I care about you. Right now this room is overwhelming. In order to gain a handle on this room, we are going to have to look at what you are holding on to.
1. Craft books: Tons of books that give directions. These books you have held on to for years. You are not using them, yet you don't want any one else to use or love them. It is time you donated them to a library and once you get your act together and finally have time to enjoy your craft again, you can go check them out of the library. Holding on them is being selfish; Thinking poor will just keep you poor.
2. Your fabric stash: Just how much fabric do you have anyway. A closet full, 5 Rubbermaid totes or a wall full of shelves. You know all those projects that you have those great intentions of doing and after you brought them home, they slipped from your mind or got pushed aside because your home was calling to you. The guilt of your messy home kept you from those projects. Now the guilt of your fabric stash, the money you have spent and your lack of time are eating away at you too. The way to let go of this guilt is to let go of our hoard. Yes you heard me right. It is time to give it away. Find a new home for your fabric, a home that will put your stash to good use. How about a hospital auxiliary: that makes quilts for the nursing home? A church group that sews quilts for the homeless or for foster children. You will be blessed by letting your stash bless others, instead of making you feel guilty.
3. Your yarn stash: Oh you have not knitted or crocheted in years and you don't know why you still have all of these skeins of yarn. It has been so long that you can't remember. It is time for them to bless the orphans, foster children and homeless. Let go and find peace.
4. So you have tons of scrape booking supplies. This is an honorable hobby, but if your home is trashed by your hobby, who is blessed by it. Combine all your supplies into a tidy group of supply boxes and use your reward time or free day to spend quality moments compiling your family pictures, drawings and mementos into your family history. Then when you are finished, (this is not an on-going project) do a few pages and put it away. No more leaving it out on the kitchen table to rob your family of the memories that you could be making if you had a cleared off table to serve your precious family nutritious meals.
5. We have so many other projects and type of crafts that take over our lives. It is time that we found new homes for our needle point, stained glass and whatever we used to do, but don't any more. Now don't email and complain about this. If you haven't done it in several years, it is not part of your life right now. If it were still a passion, you would be doing it. So let it go and as you begin to FLY, you will discover your passion again. The best part, is that it may not be any of the things that you are giving away.
As I studied all of this, I thought about the Laura Ingles Wilder books that I read as a child. Her mother would do the mending and sewing out in the middle of the room. Granted it was all they had, but when she was finished, she put it away.
Let's reclaim our craft rooms to become sacred places in our home; Reading areas, guest rooms that they were intended to be, or family game rooms, just for fun. Release the guilt and find the peace that comes through giving. When you find your passion for your creative outlet, then incorporate it into your living areas and include your family. Do not alienate yourself in a cluttered craft room or a dungeon. Then when it is time to put your work away, do it. Don't say, "I can do it later, I'll just leave it out for now!" When you have your routines, basic weekly plan and zones established, you will know when you will get back to your passion, because you will have an appointed time each day or every week.
Let go and FLY!
- FlyLady

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Perfectionism...

Dear FlyLady,

I enjoy your website and emails. You have been a real help to me. I, too, am a perfectionist . . . I can’t actually start a project because I worry that it won’t be quite right (which is why I have 6 unopened gallons of paint in my house, waiting / procrastinating to start). I know you abhor perfectionism BUT I also need to do your Body Clutter program but can’t start until YOU correct the typo on line 1 of the Body Clutter Release Contract. "I realize that I am not perfect and I never will be." I just can't print it off and post it on my wall with that error. If you fix it, I promise to start working on Body Clutter AND paint the living room this month.
Thanks a million for all you do!
Flybaby on Whidbey Island, WA .

Dear Friend,

Mistakes are the stepping stones in our lives without them we would not learn. When we find out that we do not have to be perfect to succeed then we can start our journey. Perfectionism keeps us paralyzed in our track and makes everyone feel less than. I hate perfectionism. I have struggle with it all my life; just like you have. Perfectionism rears its ugly head! Years ago I first realized that my perfectionism was making me sick! I was determined to celebrate my mistakes and use them to guide me! Not beat myself up.
A few weeks ago I received an email about perfectionism. Here it is.
Dear Friends,
Something had me get up after only being in the bed for 30 minutes. The midnight editor was not coaxing me to write! I was to read! and read I did. Here is the jewel I found in my mailbox. I am headed backto bed now.
I think we all have a midnight editor that works overtime to help us see the light and the darkness. This testimonial will touch your heart! My midnight editor is God!
Good night and sweet dreams! Dear Flylady,
Yesterday I was counselling a teenage girl at her bedside, who had recently tried to take her own life. She was desperately unhappy, and wanted nothing more than to stop her pain. Luckily she failed in her attempt. Her parents were beside themselves with despair and worry and could not figure out why she would want to do this. They called me to see if I could talk some sense in to her. This young girl is pretty, clever, popular and has no outward reasons to want to leave this life. She has a wonderful homelife and two loving parents. But as I talked to her it became clear she was fighting herself inside, because she wanted everything to be perfect. She is due to take some major exams soon, and though she is a clever 'straight A' student, she was finding it increasingly impossible to do the work, worrying and stressing and falling behind. If something wasn't perfect, she would do it again and again until it was. She obsessed about her weight and was becoming thinner and thinner. This meant she could not concentrate as she was so hungry. She wanted to be the perfect size. I listened for a while as I sat on the edge of her bed, and then I said this.
God is perfect. He alone is perfection. We can never, ever be perfect, no matter how hard we try, no matter how long we live. But that's OK, because God is love. He loves us just as we are. If we try to be perfect, we are trying to be God. If we try to make things perfect, we are trying to be like God. We cannot be God and we cannot ever hope to be like God. The most we can hope for is to make things a little better. We must not try to play God or be God. This is so wrong. God's love is perfect and He loves us perfectly. We are imperfect and we love imperfectly. But if we love God, we will try to make things a little better every day. We will show love to Him, ourselves and others. And if we make things a little better each and every day, then soon, things will be a whole lot better. God does not count the mistakes we make, he did not even count the cost of sending his own son to die on a cross for us. He just loves, because He does, not because we are perfect, or do things perfectly. If we did nothing all our lives he would not love us any more or less. We don't need to be perfect in order to be loved.
Now this girl was a professed Christian, but she had lost her way a bit in the last few years. She sat and listened to me speak to her about God and perfection, her eyes full of tears. After I finished speaking she said "I see. Thank you." Then she started laughing, and kind of crying at the same time. I would have given her a hug, but she wasn't really ready for that. I told her that I struggle with perfection too, but that it is possible to have a happy life without it. You can use this perfection thing to make the world a better place as long as it doesn't get out of hand. I left her thinking about that, and went out to see her parents, and told them what I told her. Their eyes were wide with surprise, I think they were kind of hoping I would have been able to squeeze an answer from her as to why she'd done it, and a formula as to how they could help. I think they are further away from understanding than she is at the moment. All I could advise them was "Just love her." before I left.
Now, FlyLady, I hope you will forgive me if I tell you that this episode was actually a dream I had last night. But it was also very real, because that girl was me, I did try to take my own life when I was a teenager, but I didn't have the fortune to have wonderful loving parents - I came from an abusive home. However, that young girl has been locked away inside of me for years. Now I am happily married with young children of my own, I have become the mummy I have always needed, My Husband is a wonderful father to our children. I have had very bad episodes in our marriage where I really wanted to leave and end it all, but I could never figure out why because everything was so good. Why was I doing this to myself and my family?
I have been flying for a year, but I still struggled with perfection, in myself, in my house, in my children, and my poor DH. This dream came last night, on Good Friday, as a wonderful 'God breeze' (who else could it be from?) and it helped me to help the poor girl inside let go of the pain and stress of all those years.
FlyLady, I thank you, of course the greatest tribute is to God, but a big thank you goes to you, because without your daily messages I could not have reached this point of being able to sit down with myself and have this talk (in the dream). I really hope the young girl will start flying with me soon. She is not a brat. She is a very capable but frightened young girl who is desperate for love. I will begin to show her God's love, starting from today.
We love you FlyLady
From 2 girls and her little family in UK
- FlyLady

Monday, May 5, 2008

Duster and Computers...

Dear FlyLady,

I have always been curious about something - is it dangerous to use your feather dusters on computers? I know that static electricity is not good for computers and wondered if it would cause any harm using them on the outside of computer towers and monitors?
Also, someone really should tell Dear Heloise about your wonderful dusters. In her column in our paper, she said not to use feather dusters, as they just push the dust around. She obviously has never used your FlyLady dusters!!
Thanks so much for all you do!!
Flying in Billings, MT

Dear Friend,

I have recently discovered that it is not static electricity that makes our dusters pick up the dust it is the makeup of the ostrich feather itself. If you will look at one ostrich feather you will see that it is made of thousands of little hairlike structures on each feather. It is these hairlike structures that pick up the dust.
As for using a duster around computer equipment. I dust mine all the time and our servers. The dust is more harmful than the dusting process.
Here is one of my favorite testimonials about dusting.
Dear FlyLady,
This item it just so awesome! I never knew???? As a child, my mother would make us dust and or hand wash every surface and knick knack (which were in extreme abundance) twice a month on Saturday morning before we could watch cartoons or play. I HATED DUSTING!!! Upon moving out, I avoided it as much as possible. Then I turned to my dusting wand on my vacuum. Didn't work too well, but I WAS dusting. LOL
When I started getting your newsletter, about 2 weeks ago, I was reading your website and hearing all the wonderful comments about the dusters. Then, when I signed up for the meeting here locally in March, I didn't want to be the only one without one, so I ordered the large one. It came yesterday! I was bushed after working all day, but I wanted to give this NEW thing a try, thinking it would prove what I always suspected, DUSTING IS WORK!
Well, you have definitely proved me wrong! I got soooooo excited I called my mother in Nebraska, I live in Illinois. She just laughed! She doesn't understand, but I plan to buy these for Christmas presents! I dusted my whole house, closets, ceilings, air returns, behind the washer and dryer, the furnace room, EVERYWHERE!!! I had to shake it out 22 times!!!!! The house smells so much fresher! My allergies are very bad today,due to all of my vigorous dusting, but I know that will improve greatly now.
I just had to write and thank you! At 45 I have found, you CAN teach a not-so-old dog a new trick!
Flying on now,
FlyBaby C.
- FlyLady

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