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Retirement Tips!!
You asked for it and here it is! Retirement tips sent in by other Flybabies just
like you! Whether you are already retired or getting ready to retire, this tips
are just for you. And if you have a great tip to add to our list, send it as an email
to FlyCrew@FlyLady.net and put Retired FLYer in the subject line.
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The hardest part of "retirement" for me was allowing DH to enter into the routines! I "retired" first, and though there were part-time jobs and volunteer work, I was queen of the house. Finally there was time to do it all and do it right LOL. So when both DH and I finally really "retired" on the same day (ok, we both got laid off together) it was hard for me to include him in the routines. It felt like a criticism when he took over something, but he needed things to do! My tip to new retirees is, include your spouse and let them do it their way, drop the perfectionism. As we are aging, the stairs are harder for me so DH carries the laundry up and down and does it, and I sort and put it away. We find that between the two of us, there is enough "back" to do vacuuming and floor washing, one each. My tip to married retireds is, do it together! Share the burdens, they are lighter and your marriage grows stronger when you do, as a bonus.
Hi, FlyCrew, Boy, does this strike a nerve! Here are my "tips":
1. Learn to let go.
After teaching for 27 years, it took me 4 years to realize that I was never going to use those teaching materials I was holding on to. Most of the material was outdated and no one else would want them. I finally tossed 9 black garbage bags of stuff. I even finally got rid of those college books that were taking up space on my bookshelves.
2. Learn to accept your initiations.
Accept the fact that you cannot do at 70 what you once did at 35. I love my flower garden. I used to trim all my hedges in one day. Now, I divide my garden into areas (zones) and work on one area per day. Then I stop, even if I feel I can do more. By the time I get all the areas finished, I start over. My garden is not picture-perfect, but always looks nice.
3. Look for ways to make your life easier.
My favorite "gadgets" are: my garden kneeler, which I have been using for about 10+ years. It saves my knees, and helps me get up and down; my jar opener, with metal teeth that grips the lid; my long-handled "grabber" which helps me reach those items that are too high; and of course, my timer.
4. Tell your children to come and get their stuff!
When my sons came home from the service, they brought their duffel bags home, and they sat unpacked for 10 years! My house had become a storage area for all the things the kids wanted but "didn't have room for" at their houses. A card collection, weddings gifts, art materials, service memorabilia, college books and notebooks, and the list goes on. I finally cornered them and said, "Look, when we die, and you go to sell this house, you are going to have to go through everything and take it anyway. Why not make it easier on yourselves and take what you want now, and pitch the rest." Most of it is gone. An unmarried son who moves a lot still has some things here, but everytime he comes to visit, I send something home with him.
I could go on about the many changes I have made in my life since I retired 8 years ago, but it would have to be in book form!
Thanks to Marla and all the FlyCrew, Flybaby Rose
When I retired in 2002, I set a time beyond which I would not lounge in bed. For me it was 8:30, but I usually get up earlier than that; then I always dress to "hair, shoes, and face" by 9:00 so that I can answer the door if I need to, and complete my FlyLady morning routine.
Dear Flylady,
I only joined you after I retired and you really helped me get into a routine in retirement and see how much time I should spend on house management and how much more time I could have for other things.
A calendar or diary is essential. In one look you can see which weeks will be busy and which are not. It is so important to schedule time with friends and relatives as well as chores, so your week is balanced with both activities and mixing with people. After retirement, when the fellowship of the work environment stops, it is easy to become socially isolated especially if you like a lot of solo activites. Have regular outings even if it is only walking with friends. Don't lock yourself into too many things but make time to try new activities and meet new people. I am active in my church, so they are lots of service opportunities but we also schedule occcasional fun trips to galleries etc.
Balance is the key!
Flybaby in Australia
Hi Flylady
I have been retired for 1 1/2 years and I love it. I have been fluttering and now flying for about 4 years. I wanted to share how I use Leanne's menus.
I cook a dinner for 4 as per her menus. I eat one serving, my DH eats 1 1/2 servings and my beloved dog gets 1/2 a serving. The fourth serving gets put away for the next day.
On the following day, I make "last night's dinner soup". First I make a soup base by sauteing chopped onion, garlic, carrot and celery in a large pot with some olive oil (or vegetable spray if watching my calories). Then I add one 500 ml container of broth - the type depends on what would suit last nights dinner. Bring it to a boil, then add a cup or so of frozen veggies - green beans and corn are my favorites. I then let it simmer until everything is cooked - 15 minutes or so. Then lastly, I add the final serving of last night's dinner. This soup will serve my DH and I for 2 lunches. Tastes great, is economical and very healthy. As well, homemade soup makes you look like you really know what you're doing in the kitchen.
Hope this will be helpful to the retired flybabies.
Thanks Flylady for what you do - you've brought so much peace into my home.
Love
Flybaby Lori
Dear Flylady,
The first thing I did as I aged was to fight it. I kept trying to be as fast, as clean, as smart, as fast, as friendly as hardworking as I had ever been.
Well, one day reality hit. I am not the same anymore. I have developed a lot of bad habits. I am not able to do all that I used to do. I have aged. I do not have the energy that I had before. I am slow. It frustrated me to be so slow.
And so the big thing I did was to accept it all. I accept that I am living life at a slower pace. I accept my age, and my slowness. And I accept help now.
Then I came back to Flylady.com to get a tuneup on how to get it all done on so much less energy, and so much slower than I ever was before.
Now I find that the days where I allow myself to rest from all work with no guilt are often the most productive. I think the difference is that I am not fighting against the things I SHOULD be doing. For one day a week, whatever gets done gets done, no guilt. Freedom from guilt seems to open up the energy flow and usually something that was impossible for me to do before suddenly gets done.
So - Accept yourself. Accept help. No guilt.
Susan
Thank you so much for thinking of us older fly babies.
The greatest advice you give, is you can do anything for 15 minutes.
Sometimes when your having a bad day health wise it keeps you going.
I love shining my sink and this makes me clean my kitchen.
I take baby steps every day and keep going.
Thank you so much for helping all of us.
Linda in NM
I bought a kneeler/seat for use in the garden. You can flip it over to use it as a seat with legs or as a kneeler with handles to help you get back up. I use it in the kitchen and the bathroom a lot as it helps me get down to the floor and back up, again. When I put it in the kitchen I noticed dh uses it, too.
FLO
Hello,
When you first retire take some months to decide what you really want to do Ð don't rush into all and sundry and find yourself overwhelmed.
You can very easily get caught up in the coffee or lunch rounds, make sure this is what you want and be firm if people ask you to go out and you really don't have the time or money to do it. Always be grateful for being asked. Perhaps suggest an alternative like going for a walk Ð healthy or going to a gallery. Make sure you see the people you want to see.
Make sure that minding grandchildren is on your terms and times, after all it is now your time in life to do those things you really enjoy and haven't had the time to do when working. However grandchildren are a joy and being with them keeps you young and happy
Join a book club or a film appreciation group start one with your friends. Meeting very month or three weeks seems the best time frame.
Most of us have elderly parent to care for, getting the balance right is difficult. I ring every day and visit every second day Ð my mum would have me there all the time if she could. It is sometimes difficult not to feel guilty. There are counsellors who can help with concerns related to elderly parents. In Australia they are free and part of the carers association. I find them helpful.
The University of the Third Age has interesting and varied courses- well worth the $25 for a year's membership.
FlyLady suggests getting up and putting on your shoes and gathering up the washing each day. This starts the day and gives routine, something lacking after years of racing off to work.
You will have time to relax and do sodoku or cryptic crosswords.
Don't stress the small stuff.
There is a whole new world out there and most importantly have fun and don't forget to let the child in you have a run.
Anne
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