Hi FlyLady,

I have been receiving your mailings for about 3 years or more.  I have been through many stages of success and “warfare”.  Right now, I am in a state of “warfare”.

I’ll do really well for weeks or months, and then, suddenly a decline begins to happen somewhere, criticisms begin to come from others who don’t understand or don’t appreciate what I do, or I begin to get frustrated with my Dear Husband and 3 children ages 7, 5, and 21month, because they seem blind to the fact that I’m trying exhaustively to keep order.

I try to keep the “blessing” mentality, and I do great for a while, but in times of extreme “warfare” I have become almost depressed or apathetic, then the house becomes a wreck again.  How can I overcome this roller coaster ride of success and warfare??  Please “rebuke” me and guide me and I will be grateful.  Thanks.

Flying hi and lo in Georgia!

Dear Georgia,

The problem as I see it is that you are at war with your family! They are not your enemies. They are your babies and they are only following your example. Quit treating your family as if they were your enemies and entice them to be on your team. You are not establishing your routines. So they are not seeing the happy results. You set the tone for your home. If you act like they are your enemies; they will be!

Even your 21 month old baby can put away toys if you will make it fun. Children love routines. Children love timers. Children need parents to set the example and be parents. NOT THE ENEMY!

Establish a morning routine and a before bed routine. Take babysteps. You may have too much clutter too. When you have lots of clutter and toys around; the babies can pull out more than you can put back. Get them to help you bless others with some of this toy clutter. Once it is out of the house you will have less to pick up. Then each hour at the top of the hour; play “the put away toy” game.

You can do this! You have to quit whining!

FlyLady