Dear FlyLady,

I’m a determined flybaby. You have helped me to believe I can do this (baby steps). My self talk has always been hateful because that is all I knew, but that is changing. I’m  finally seeing that i don’t have to be the (illusive) perfect person. There’s no such thing anyway. Perfectionism always made me quit before I got started or quit in the middle of it all, proclaiming that once again I’ve failed.  My mother’s idea of cleaning was to take the broom and starting in the back bedrooms, sweep everything down the hall through the living room and kitchen and out the back door. There was a huge pile of garbage for my dad to take out to the burn pile. I’m not kidding. Bless her heart, she was mentally ill but as a child I didn’t understand that. I remember moldy dishes floating in old water in the kitchen sink and fearing she’d make me wash them and she often did. She was so angry all the time.  I rarely went to anyone’s home and no one came to ours. So when I became a teen I was shocked to find out how other people lived. Then I believed there was something desperately wrong with us. I was ashamed because I could never have friends over which eventually translated into, I had no friends. I looked back at those painful memories  with so much anger and hatred. Now i can feel sympathy and understanding which has freed my heart and soul. How does perfectionism make inroads? I really don’t understand. All I know is that it makes us angry, frustrated, depressed, hopeless and lonely. So thank you for extending a hand to me to help me up & out of that deep dark rut of clutter and self hate. I did not understand that we can’t organize junk and clutter. I always heard the old saying,  do it right or do it twice but i didn’t know what right was. Put it away never made sense. Where’s away? That just meant get rid of it somewhere. When I tried to get answers from organized people they’d always say, you just do it. Do what? I would wonder. That all may sound dramatic but when we begin to fly we see clearly what the clutter and lack of routines is doing to us and the those we love. I digress from my intended topic, so sorry. Just wanted to convey a heartfelt thank you.

Anyway, my DH is a teacher here in Oklahoma so our budget is tight. Eating out was killing our budget. My house is in good order, thanks to you. I was able to find a cookbook I bought years ago but had never used. It’s  called, “Once a Month Cooking”. I have all my cooking utensils organized with all that i needed for this project and my sink is shining so I got busy.  I followed their plan, step by step and got all the cooking done in one day. Shopping one day and cooking the next. (I followed the one month plan but they have a few 2 week plans also)  The recipes are simple and easy to put together.  Some are assembled raw ready for the oven, grill or crockpot & others are cooked ahead and warmed in the microwave. My freezer has a month of entrees which translates into 6 weeks for the 2 of us. All the sides are planned in advance also. So now at supper my DH says, “Honey, is this one of those recipes? This is really good” He’s so happy and it makes me just smile and my little ole heart just swells with happiness. It’s a triple blessing because we’re saving money, we’re not wasting because we take the left overs for lunch. We’re varying our menus so we’re not bored. Lastly, I’m not wringing my hands in front of the fridge at 3 o’clock wondering what on earth I’m going to get on the table nor am I suggesting some restaurant. Thanks to your Flylady plan and the menu planning habit for this month we’re thrilled with the changes in our life. My DH compliments me all the time about the progress he sees in our home and loves it that we can finally have friends over. I can’t thank you enough. I’m learning from you and getting the encouragement I need to Fly on and up.

God bless you, dear Flylady. Oklahoma Highflyer.

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