Dear Friends,

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we had a time machine so we could right the wrongs that have been done to us? The weird part is we can’t change what was done to us because we weren’t the ones doing the bad thing. We were just the recipient of their bad behavior. We only have control over ourselves. So in the end that time machine would not work for us anyway.

Well let’s think about what we can do, but first let’s look at what we have been doing that has not been helpful.

1. Being angry at how we were treated.
2. Stuffing our feelings so we don’t have to deal with them.
3. Not speaking to the people who hurt you.
4. Allowing your anger to overshadow the good things in your life.
5. Being jealous of others who are happy
6. Playing the martyr and you know what I am talking about; Oh poor pitiful me.

We have to eliminate this clutter from our lives. We don’t get to pick our families; we just get change the way we feel about them. Leanne and I wrote about this in our book Body Clutter. Forgiveness is the tool we use to get rid of our pain and resentment.

When you hate, it is like you taking poison to hurt the person who has mistreated you. That only perpetuates the abuse and your family are the ones who suffer most.

What steps can you take to let go of the pain?

For me I did a lot of praying. Our father abandoned us when I was ten years old. For years we were brainwashed by a mother who was bitter. Her bitterness made her hateful. She burned all of his pictures. She was loud and angry. Her pain punished us not daddy. So you see I really had two people to forgive. No I really had three people to forgive. I needed to forgive myself too for all of my own mistakes.

The act of forgiving is as simple as flipping a switch. I know you don’t believe it. It is just that easy when we let go of the pain. I got an email yesterday from FlyBaby Ann. I could not find who said it first. But it is worth sharing. It reminds me of the song from the movie, Frozen.

Dear FlyLady,
 I thought you would appreciate this reading.
Ann

If you are holding on to something that doesn’t belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to… LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to past hurts and pains…  LET IT GO!!!

If someone can’t treat you right, love you back, and see your worth…  LET IT GO!!!

If someone has angered you… LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge… LET IT GO!!!

If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction… LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents… LET IT GO!!!

If you have a bad attitude… LET IT GO!!!

If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better…LET IT GO!!!

If you’re stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new level in God… LET IT GO!!!

If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship…LET IT GO!!!

If you keep trying to help someone who won’t even try to help themselves… LET IT GO!!!

If you’re feeling depressed and stressed…LET IT GO!!!

If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling yourself and God is saying “take your hands off of it,” then you need to…LET IT GO!!!

Let the past be the past. Forget the former things. GOD is doing a new thing for this day!!! LET IT GO!!!

Get Right or Get Left. Think about it, and then… LET IT GO!!!

Thank you Ann for sharing this with us. We don’t need a time machine. We can’t relive our childhoods, but we can choose to LIVE from this day forward. Your past is behind you! All we really have is today! Accept this present and be thankful.

The best revenge is to be happy! Not that I believe in seeking revenge! I want for you what I have; peace. This peace came from forgiveness.

FlyLady

I have a little homework assignment for you. I want you to make a list of all your resentments and people you have not forgiven. Then put them in your fireplace and set them a blaze. You can use an aluminum plate outside or a metal trash can. Burn baby Burn! Watch those resentments go up in smoke.

My twenty-one year old nephew just tweeted! At some point you have to stop planning and start building!  Let’s change one word and see how it applies to us. At some point, you have to stop pouting and start building! What are you going to build once you stop pouting about the past; yourself, your life, your home and your family?

We have everything you need to keep your home shining! Sometimes we need a little motivation. Our efficient tools give us a jump start! They make a tough job fun. If you make it fun; it will get done!

FlyLady here; Holiday Cruising Missions have started . Go download your free Holiday Control Journal.