Dear Friends,

What is it about our attitudes that tell us we can’t! The least little thing gets in our way and we automatically throw in the towel before we ever get started. It is as if we are defeated or maybe it is we get all excited about something and we get deflated and our little bubble just bursts. How sad is it that we give up before we ever get started. My Granny always said, Can’t(Kaint) never could do anything!

In the last few days I have received a few emails from people whining that they do not have the money to fix Thanksgiving dinner. I will never forget one year that I didn’t have any money either. There was not enough money to go visit my family and I was really sad. It was my first holiday in North Carolina and at the time I was married to a dufuss (Southern for not a very smart person). I wanted our first Thanksgiving Day to be special.

I think the difference was that I was determined to make it work. I wonder if determination is really the difference or the fact that I am stubborn and refused to allow someone to beat me down. I have always known I was smart and given any circumstance I could and would succeed. I don’t know if I was born with this kind of determination or if it was just rebellion. The only reason I am trying to figure this out is because I want to help you get rid of the learned behavior of giving up and reteach you how to look adversity in the face and say just hide and watch me!

When we give up and don’t even try; we are allowing all the nay sayers in our lives and our past to win! The best revenge is to just show them that you can do it! You don’t have to come out and say it but you can yell it at the top of your lungs in the shower! GO ME! We have to learn how to be our own biggest cheerleader! Who else is going to cheer you on! I will but until you replace those negative words in your head; I will be fighting with them every day.

We are the most creative people in the world. Just this morning I was talking to my friend. We discussed giving up and why our FlyBabies give up before they even give it a try. We came to the conclusion that it was that ugly “P” word again Perfectionism. If we didn’t even try, we couldn’t fail. At this point I think the guilt we feel from giving up is worse than the failure. Who knows what might have been if we had only given it a whole hearted try!

I told my friend about my Thanksgiving Dinner that I had made with only the change I could find in the house and the car which was less than $25.00. She told me about her first Christmas as a single mom and not many presents under the tree for Christmas morning. She had felt that it was pretty slim pickins’. She went into the basement to try to find some more things to wrap and put under the tree. She found a box of balloons. This is when she decided to blow up as many balloons as she could to create a party atmosphere when the kids came down the stairs the next morning. Balloons were everywhere. The room was filled! Then the most amazing thing happened, they let the cat inside. He proceeded to attack each balloon. Her grown children do not remember other Christmas mornings. They still talk about the Christmas the cat attacked the balloons.

We have been programmed by our raising. We have to turn those negative attitudes of you can’t do anything right into “I think I can”, “I think I can”, “I think I can”!  Do you remember, “The Little Engine That Could”? If you don’t then you may not have been read this story. It may be time for you to read it and keep it close by so you can read it every day! You can change your attitude if you think you can! That is most of the battle! Once you get past the attitude all things are possible.

The idea here is to train that little child in us! We can do this and it starts here when we let go of our anger, fear and perfectionism! We are going to reprogram our brains; one email at a time! Have you ever used Post-it Notes to remind you of something? They work for retraining our brains too! I did it by listening to motivational tapes, some of us have used bracelets or rubberbands. We are so smart and when we know what the plan is we embrace it! This is why FLYing works so well for us! We use our timers, Control Journals and emails to remove those negative attitudes and replace them with that can do
loving spirit that brings peace to our lives.

This holiday season and every day of the year it is up to you! You set the tone for your home! Are you going to be a Scrooge or a Tiny Tim? It is your actions that reflect that inner spirit! Embrace that “I Think I Can” spirit and find yourself FLYing with your own personal cheerleader! YOU!

I know you can do this; my job is convincing you that YOU can FLY!

Are you ready to Cruise through the Holidays?
FlyLady

P.S. This is what our book Body Clutter is all about! Retraining our brains!