Dear FlyLady,

Thank you for freeing me from guilt and resentment!

I have always wanted a clean and tidy house. My husband has many good qualities, but housekeeping isn’t his thing. He helps me out by doing a lot of tasks that I don’t want to do, but the cleaning work has really all been on me.

Over the years I have felt worse and worse about this. Friends and family have told me that I needed to “make him do his share” of the cleaning. Thinking about this made me feel resentful towards him. I tried nagging him about doing various chores. You can imagine how that went. We were both upset and miserable.

I gave that up after a while and went back to doing the housework myself. But I wasn’t happy about it. I kept thinking to myself that I was doing all this work “for him” and it made me angry. I also felt guilty that I hadn’t gotten him to do “his share.” I had failed to manage our family.

Reading your messages, it finally clicked. I am not cleaning our house “for him.” I am cleaning it for myself! He doesn’t care if I dust and sweep the floors. But it matters tremendously to me that our home is a beautiful place where I enjoy spending time. That is why I have been doing this all along!

It seems so simple, but realizing that has totally shifted my attitude. Now I feel happy doing little tasks to keep our home beautiful.

Plus, your system is so efficient that it takes me much less time to keep our house in good shape. I used to binge clean everything at once and then feel exhausted and burnt out for days. That is when those resentful feelings would rise to surface. These days with a little daily maintenance things are looking good! And I am learning to let go of the idea that it ever has to be “perfect.”

Thank you so much for all you have done for us!

– FlyBaby in MA

We have everything you need to keep your home shining! Sometimes we need a little motivation. Our efficient tools give us a jump start! They make a tough job fun. If you make it fun; it will get done!