Pamper Mission 07/29/02

Dear Friends,

I had the opportunity to share FlyLady with a new acquaintance this week and he asked if FlyLady was for women only. I told him no, that we do have men who use FLYing techniques, but in regards to the pampering missions, I usually write those with our female members in mind. Later that evening, I gave my answer a little more thought and decided that it was time to address men’s “pampering” needs in this column.

Men need time to themselves just like we do. All work and no play makes a man grumpy, uptight, bored, and boring. It’s very important for men to find something they enjoy doing and can lose themselves in so that they can recharge their emotional “batteries.” For example, I have a family member who makes running a priority in his life. No matter what’s going on in his life or where his travel takes him, he always makes time for a run. If he doesn’t manage to get in his run, he’s much less pleasant to be around. His need to run is as strong as my need for air. Some men love to fish or play/watch sports, others enjoy working with their hands, Soduko puzzles fascinate others, while musical instruments or singing enthralls others. There are as many possible leisure time pursuits as there are personalities and discovering your favorite is part of the fun.

A reminder for the ladies: It’s important that we support the men in our lives in their endeavors to have some time for themselves. Time spent away at work does not count, as much as we think it should sometimes. LOL It is important to have a healthy balance of work, family time, and play time. Just because your man needs time to himself doesn’t mean he’s not happy with you, any more than when you spend time on yourself that it means you’re unhappy with him. It simply means he’s human! We all need time for ourselves just to be ourselves, without expectations and obligations. Time to do what we really want to do or the freedom to do nothing at all. We can’t be “on” all the time; we all need a little time off.

This week let’s focus on the importance of free time in our lives and in the lives of those we love. This time is not a luxury to only be enjoyed after every other obligation has been met. It is a necessity that will give us the mental stamina to deal with the stress of our
day to day lives with grace and kindness. Take time for yourself to do your favorite “leisure” activity and encourage those around you to do the same. While the old saying about how the family that plays together, stays together does have merit, it is just as important that each family member have time to themselves for the family unit to remain healthy and strong.

Pamper yourself! You are so worth it!

Love,

FlyLady Dana

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